well, they certainly got the TRICK part down.

Happy Halloween? Not so much.

To start this blog right, I will preface it with the fact that *we sort-of live in the ghetto*

The first wave of kids that showed up were teen moms with their two year olds in strollers.

The second wave of were kids that scoffed when we only gave them two pieces of candy.

The third was a kid that opened my front door and took some candy. Granted, it was the neighbor boy, but stiiiill.....opening my door? IDON'TTHINKSO.

The last boy was a 14 year old, no costume, no candy bucket and he was on his cell phone. Just stuck his hand out.

The next morning I realized my giant pumpkin had been stolen, and smashed down the street.

Add the pumpkin to the list of things that have been stolen:

2 umbrellas

a Mum

For the love of all that is good and holy, what the hell is wrong with this neighborhood??

I am already dreaming of living in a safe suburban cookie cutter neighborhood, where my neighbors are polite and are THANKFUL for free candy and I can walk around with my boy and enjoy the holiday. For now, I just won't keep anything else on my porch.

In honor of breastfeeding week, I'm going to cry some more

I thought I was over it*.

It*, being, the fact that we had to stop breastfeeding.

I should rephrase that- we didn't HAVE to but after three months of baby's non-stop crying and pain due to a sensitivity to lactose, we chose to stop. I could've waited it out another 3+ months till his stomach settled, but I was on the verge of a major breakdown.

So, with that said, we had to stop breastfeeding. Most of you who have stuck around HGBB know this fact already. And I thought, I was over it. A tearful phone call to a good friend yesterday morning proved otherwise. I am not over the disappointment, sadness and pain that I feel from not getting that experience with my baby. To give him the best nutrition possible. To bond.

I needed to be 'over it' because its just what I had to do. To accept it. To move on. To be a happy mommy for my baby. But, being that it's breastfeeding week and all, my Facebook and blog reading list is inundated with photos, blogs and news articles about how horrible formula is and how superior boob milk is, and it's honestly making me feel pretty crappy. I KNOW that formula isn't the best, but what else can I do at this point? I'm such a natural person, I totally anticipated bfeeding for over a year...and that is not possible anymore.

I expect mom's to be proud that they are breastfeeding, it just hurts that I can't. I wish I wasn't affected by opinions and other people, but I am. Especially when it comes to that little 17 lb bundle of joy that I call my son; whom I am happy to say is happier, lovelier and cuter than ever. So, formula may suck, but my kid is happy. All haters can just suck it; a bottle of formula that is. ;)

a love note from my teeth

the best part is leaving.

stale florescant lighting. the smell of latex. handles and tubes covered in plastic. as I lay uncomforably in my chair turned bed, the stranger with a blinking birthday pin has her rubber gloves in my mouth. sharp metal tools lay to her right. my eyes search for something to look at. it finds no tv like I was hoping for, only gold twirly birthday celebrations hanging from the dropped ceiling and photos of black cancer gums. then she starts talking. I dont know who's more uncomforable here, me or her. she is, after all, the one with her fingers in my mouth. maybe the silence is more awkward for her, so she makes lame jokes and comments on things, as though, she expects me to answer. 70 bucks i'm shelling out to have her rubbery fingers jarr my mouth apart and make talking sound like a chore. there's pain too, of course, where her metal tools scrape away the tartar. I grimace, she says sorry, I'm doing this the best I can. pahf! I get ansty by the moment, swallowing excess pools of saliva, and it was then she turned on the sucker. the sound of air being sucked rapidly into a little tube, sckkooooooooooooooo, and the sckoopppPPP! the sound of my cheeks hallowed from moisture. here, a little squirt of water for you, swish it, ok, sckkoooopppPPP! ah, those 4 ounces of water feel like an oasis. she tells me, brush the insides better. ok, lady will do. enters male dentist. hello, how are you, any sensitivity? nope. good. ok...........8 seconds later.... you're in great shape, see you later! exits doctor. wow, how much is HE getting paid? I get my free toothbrush, and get the hell out of there.

the best part is leaving...6 months is all I have.