It's quickly approaching, at a mere 56 days according to my i-Phone ticker. So wether I'm late [heavens, please no, not again] I'm 'ripe' and ready, or even early [gasp! do I even entertain the thought?] time is ticking away. Tick...tick...ticking away. So today I prepared for birth by watching A Baby Story. I usually avoid it completely because as a home birthing mama, the hospital intervention/mantra completely stress me out. But today's episode was a home/water birth, and it was so real. She was in pain, for sure, but it was still peaceful. It was beautiful. She birthed her daughter in the water and pulled her up to her chest.
AND I LOST IT. Bawling-my-eyes-out LOST IT. It made my heart swell up with overwhelming excitement and anticipation for MY moment. For that first moment when I get to hold my little baby girl in my arms. To finally see the life that I've been growing and dreaming about.
I can say with all honesty I have about 98% confidence and peace in my heart when I think about labor.
So that leaves a mere 2% of me that is FREAKING out.
Question for the mamas reading: how did/do you prepare for labor? The first time is so scary and unknown, so is the second[+] time easier because of having less to fear?
I welcome any encouraging advice, prayers and wisdom. I'd like to eradicate that 2% if at all possible ;)
Love, Yana
3 comments:
i always say the same thing.
You can do this.
anything can happen
God loves you so it will be good
And i say that with all the peace in the world...Your birth has already played out in God's world. He knows what you will do how long it will take and that He will be with you the whole time...so it's all good. Just like you've got your little girl...he's holding you yana. xoxo
Everytime... and I mean this in any birth or adoption of all 7 of my kids... I have to come to a place where I am okay with getting exactly what I want...or not. ( and you know I have birthed everywhere and alone)
Everytime when I come to that place where I can birth at home, in a hospital or an aisle at Target... that is when I know I am ready. Because to take the fear away...is not logical.. but to know that come what may , I will handle it sensibly (albeit loudly and with a few swears)... that is peace.
T
my cervix is a loser, so I have had 4 cesareans with 2 attempted vbacs.....my prep list is going to be of no help to you.
however, I have been so behind on my blog reading and I've missed out on your entire pregnancy!!! a girl? how amazing, congrats to you guys, love it.
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